Rob gets plastered (and not with drink)...

Hi There,

Well folks, we have had an exciting weekend at Shambles Manor - On Friday evening after catching up with my 'soaps' on TV I settled down to have a half hour relax - result? I conked out and didn't wake for an hour. When I wakened it was to hear Rob murmering about his arm being painful...

Now Rob to be honest has a habit of rushing about like a looney and it's not altogether unusual for him to trip over his own feet so later on at bedtime he told me about having tripped over a cord which was on the floor at his side of the bed. (the cord by the way of a paper shredder which he had used a week ago) Rob being Rob would not hear of going to the hospital to get checked out, even after he showed me his arm .... He must have hit the floor at one hellova rate 'cos his arm was badly bruised. That was on Friday night, on Saturday morning it was still painful and it took me all day to persuade him to go with me to the Accident unit at the Victoria Hospital.

We finally arrived at the accident unit on Saturday at 6pm. He was eventually diagnosed at 8pm with two broken bones in his arm and so at 9pm we left the hospital with 'himself' sporting a beautiful 'stookie' (plaster) on his left arm. Apart from this, he is in pain all over his neck and back - You know what he finds 'most annoying' though - it is that he can't drive and has to be chauvoured around by a woman ... very bad for his ego ! The thing is I can almost hear his brain trying to work out how he can with his four friends go out to a meeting to Cumbernauld ... with 'him' driving...

Have I ever told you about how years ago he fell while working on a roof through two floors and had his brother (who he was working with) to help drive by moving the gear lever while Rob used the pedals... they managed to drive like that for over 30 miles to a hospital - Now that was bad enough but after the hospital had wrapped his injuries he then proceeded to drive the same way back to his home ...... arrrrghhh !! This was nearly 40 years ago... and he laughs about it now thinking what a great carry-on it all was !!

I'm dreading the next few weeks because he will be like a bear with a sore head because he won't be able to just hop into the car and go where he wants to !!

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Something to cheer you up...

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A Heavenly funny ...

Jesus and Satan were having an on-going argument about who was better on the computer. They had been going at it for days and frankly God was tired of hearing all the bickering. Finally fed up God said 'THAT'S IT! I have had enough. I am going to set up a test that will run for two hours, and from those results, I will judge who does the better job.' So Satan and Jesus sat down at the keyboards and typed away.

They moused. They faxed. They e-mailed. They e-mailed with attachments. They downloaded. They did spreadsheets. They wrote reports. They created labels and cards. They created charts and graphs. They did some genealogy reports . They did every job known to man. Jesus worked with heavenly efficiency and Satan was faster than hell.

Then ten minutes before their time was up, lightning suddenly flashed across the sky, thunder rolled, rain poured and of course, the power went off. Satan stared at his blank screen and screamed every curse word known in the underworld. Jesus just sighed.

Finally the electricity came back on and each of them restarted their computers. Satan started searching frantically screaming:

'It's gone! It's all GONE! 'I lost everything when the power went out!'
Meanwhile Jesus quietly started printing out all of his files from the past two hours of work.
Satan observed this and became irate.
'Wait!' he screamed. 'That's not fair! He cheated! How come he has all his work and I don't have any?'
God just shrugged and said


Cheers, Kate xxx.