Holidays and Accidents ...

Hi Folks,


My youngest grandson Louis went on holiday with his Mum and Dad 10 days ago, being 5 years old he is able to enjoy more about the concept and he went prepared with bucket, spade, water wings along with several little pressies of pocket money for treats while he was away... He was due to come back home on Sunday past but unfortunately the wee soul ended up feeling not very good a few days after he arrived in Benalmadena and was diagnosed with Chicken Pox ... This means that he couldn't fly back on Sunday , the doctor advised that he stay on for another 6 days which means that he should be coming back to Scotland on Friday .... and not be at risk of infecting others. I don't suppose he will be too happy about it - because he has had to be kept indoors away from other folk 'and from the sun' ...... Imagine being on holiday near the beach and not be able to get outside awwww... poor wee soul.

It never rains - but it pours mind you - while rushing about yesterday morning and not looking and paying attention to where I was going I tripped and banged my toes into the metal legs on one of our settees... PAINFUL ? yeah, it sure was ...... As the day went on it got more so! Eventually, later in the day I took a look at my foot and I removed my sandal to find that two of my toes were swollen and had gone black with bruising ...... Nice, so Rob and I ended up at the emergency unit of our local hospital last night to be told by the doctor that I had broken two toes - So I'm now sporting strapped up toes due to my rushing about, (apparently that's all they do these days - apart from dosing you with painkillers that is).

That's what I get for not looking where I was going, so what's next .... things like this always come in threes ???

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FOR THOSE WHO LOVE THE PHILOSOPHY OF AMBIGUITY, AS WELL AS THE IDIOSYNCRASIES OF ENGLISH: Please enjoy and understand the following - there are others which I will probably post later .

1.
DON'T SWEAT THE PETTY THINGS AND DON'T PET THE SWEATY THINGS.
2.
ONE TEQUILA, TWO TEQUILA, THREE TEQUILA, FLOOR.
3.
ATHEISM IS A NON-PROPHET ORGANIZATION.
4.
IF MAN EVOLVED FROM MONKEYS AND APES, WHY DO WE STILL HAVE MONKEYS AND APES?
5. THE MAIN REASON THAT SANTA IS SO JOLLY IS BECAUSE HE KNOWS WHERE ALL THE BAD GIRLS LIVE.
6. I WENT TO A BOOKSTORE AND ASKED THE SALESWOMAN, "WHERE'S THE SELF- HELP SECTION?" SHE SAID IF SHE TOLD ME, IT WOULD DEFEAT THE PURPOSE.
7. WHAT IF THERE WERE NO HYPOTHETICAL QUESTIONS?
8.
IF A DEAF CHILD SIGNS SWEAR WORDS, DOES HIS MOTHER WASH HIS HANDS WITH SOAP?
9.
IF SOMEONE WITH MULTIPLE PERSONALITIES THREATENS TO KILL HIMSELF, IS IT CONSIDERED A
HOSTAGE SITUATION?
10. IS THERE ANOTHER WORD FOR SYNONYM?
11.
WHERE DO FOREST RANGERS GO TO "GET AWAY FROM IT ALL?"
12. WHAT DO YOU DO WHEN YOU SEE AN ENDANGERED ANIMAL EATING AN ENDANGERED PLANT?
13. IF A PARSLEY FARMER IS SUED, CAN THEY GARNISH HIS WAGES?
14. WOULD A FLY WITHOUT WINGS BE CALLED A WALK?
15. WHY DO THEY LOCK GAS STATION BATHROOMS? ARE THEY AFRAID SOMEONE WILL CLEAN THEM?

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A moving advert ......





Cheers from the land of the Tartan, Love Kate xxx.