Without Make-up / Funnies / The Asylum Game / End of C.Sense ..

Hi Folks,


Ladies, If this doesn't make your day - nothing will !


I vote for Goldie Hawn's make-up artist. No wonder it takes a whole team of professional make up folk to enable these women look half as good as you do on a normal day. Imagine what their teams could do with the raw material YOU present!

Have a great day and KNOW that YOU are gorgeous inside and out.
And you thought they were natural beauties?





Do not leave small children unattended with dogs!

Please read! If you are an owner of a dog that belongs to a 'dangerous breed' category and you also have a small child please take this as a warning..... Don't leave your dog with the child unattended under any circumstances. Only a little moment was enough for the following to happen. See the photo above .....

A driver is stuck in a traffic jam ... on the motorway. Nothing is moving. Suddenly a man knocks on the window. The driver rolls down his window and asks, "What's going on?" "Terrorists have kidnapped Mugabe, Jacob Zuma, Jackie Selebi, Thabo Mbeki and Tony Yengeni. They're asking for a R310 million ransom. Otherwise they're going to douse them with petrol and set them on fire. We're going from car to car, taking up a collection." The driver asks, "How much is everyone giving, on
average?"
"Ohhhh about a litre."
Good Day and welcome ...... to a brand new edition of 'ASYLUM'. Today's program features another chance to take part in our exciting competition: HIJACK AN AIRLINER and win A COUNCIL HOUSE! We've already given away hundreds of millions of pounds and thousands of dream homes, courtesy of our sponsor, The British Taxpayer. And don't forget, we're now the fastest growing game on the planet. Anyone can play, provided they don't already hold a valid British Passport, and you only need one word of English: 'ASYLUM' Prizes include all-expenses-paid accommodation, cash benefits starting at £180 a week and a chance to earn thousands more begging, mugging and accosting drivers at traffic lights.
This competition is open to everyone buying a ticket or stowing away on one of our partner airlines, ferry companies or Eurostar. No application ever refused -reasonable or unreasonable. All you have to do is destroy all your papers and remember the magic password: 'ASYLUM' A few years ago, 140 members of the Taliban family from Afghanistan were flown Goat Class from Kabul to our international gateway at Stansted where local law enforcement officers were on hand to fast-track them to their luxury £200-a-night rooms in the fabulous four star Hilton Hotel. They joined tens of thousands of other lucky winners already staying in hotels all over Britain ... Our most popular destinations also include the White Cliffs of Dover and the world famous Toddington Services area, in Historic Bedfordshire.
If you still don't understand the rules, don't forget, there's no need to phone a friend or ask the audience Just apply for legal aid. Hundreds of lawyers, social workers and counsellors are waiting to help. It won't cost you a penny. It could change your life forever. So play today. Iraqi terrorists, Afghan dissidents, Albanian gangsters, pro-Pinochet activists, anti-Pinochet activists, Kosovan drug-smugglers, Tamil tigers, bogus Bosnians, Rwandan mass murderers, Somali guerrillas..... COME ON DOWN! Get along to the airport! Get along to the lorry park! Get along to the ferry terminal! Don't stop in Germany or France ! Go straight to Britain And you are: GUARANTEED to be one of tens of thousands of lucky winners in the easiest game on earth. Everyone's a winner, when they play 'ASYLUM' ....

NEWS FACT: ESTIMATED 350,000 IMMIGRANTS INTO UK IN THE LAST 12 MONTHS. NEWS TWO DAYS AGO: 32,000 ILLEGALLY IMMIGRANTS DEPORTED IN THE LAST 12 MONTHS! WORK THE SUCCESS RATE OUT FOR YOURSELF!!!
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I blogged about this man last week and now he is so fed up and scunnered that he has given up - Is this not absolutely nuts ......

Language ban Postmaster quits ...... A postmaster who refused to serve customers who could not understand English has told how he was "forced out" of his Post Office after a backlash in the community. The postmaster who refused to serve customers who did not speak English has resigned Sri-Lankan-born Deva Kumarasiri said he turned away five people from his Nottingham post office for "wasting time and holding up the queue" by not speaking English.

The 40-year-old father of two, from Carlton, Nottingham, said most people had come out in support of his stance, but a "small minority" launched a petition against him. Now he has quit the Sneinton Boulevard post office at his own request because he was left with no choice, he said. From now on he will be based at a different Post Office in Nottingham, but hopes to move back to his former branch in the future. "I was forced out by a small minority of people who don't want to integrate into society," Mr Kumarasiri said. "I was threatened and Muslim leaders in the community started a petition to get me out, so today I moved at my own request.

"The manager didn't like my policy either and said I lost him a lot of trade, but I only banned five people. If I could I would be out campaigning about this every day, but I have a mortgage to pay, I have to work. "I didn't impose a complete ban, I told people to learn some English or come back with an interpreter. They come back with the right attitude now.

"It is just common sense. If these people are coming into our country they should practice our language and culture. As far as I am concerned, if you can't be British you should go home. This is our country, let's work together to save it because the Government doesn't have the backbone to solve the problem."
A Post Office spokesman said: "We are continuing to monitor the situation."




Cheers from the land of the Tartan and the Heather, Love Kate xxx.