Joke m&m and some wee tales...

Help ! I'm being attacked by a Troll !

The first Prince brought a sword of finest steel..

The Second Prince brought Diamonds...

The Third one had something better in his pocket.

Once Upon a time there lived a king. The king had a beautiful daughter, the PRINCESS. But there was a problem. Everything the princess touched would melt. No matter what; Metal, Wood, Stone. Everything she touched would melt. Because of this, men were afraid of her. Nobody would dare marry her. The king despaired. What could he do to help his daughter? He consulted his wizards and magicians. One wizard told the king, 'If your daughter touches one thing that does not melt in her hands, she will be cured.' The king was overjoyed and came up with a plan. The next day, he held a competition. Any man that could bring his daughter an object that would not melt would marry her and inherit the king's wealth. THREE YOUNG PRINCES TOOK UP THE CHALLENGE. The first brought a sword of the finest steel. But alas, when the princess touched it, it melted. The prince went away sadly . The second prince brought diamonds. He thought diamonds are the hardest substance in the world and would not melt. But alas, once the princess touched them, they melted. He too was sent away disappointed. The third prince approached. He told the princess, 'Put your hand in my pocket and feel what is in there.' The princess did as she was told, though she turned red . She felt something hard. She held it in her hand. And it did not melt!!! The king was overjoyed. Everybody in the kingdom was overjoyed. The third prince married the princess and they both lived happily ever after. Question: What was in the prince's pants?

M & M's of course. They melt in your mouth - not in your hand - what did you think it was ??
Hi Folks,

My husband often takes my hand when we are out. We find it the easiest way to walk together as we support each other. Seeing us hand-in-hand, a boy of about six asked my husband. "Is she your girlfriend?" "She's my wife," he replied. Next he looked at me and asked " Is he your boyfriend?" "No, he's my husband," I smiled, he didn't seem to understand, but before he got in the next question his mother called him. He wasn't being rude or cheeky, just wondering why an old couple were behaving like teenagers...
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I've heard about a blue sink that wasn't blue and faulty lamps that weren't faulty reminded me of a friend whose irons never last very long. When one packed up yet again, her mother treated her to an inexpensive one. She decided to tackle the backlog straight away while they chatted. A few moments later there was a strange smell. She had failed to remove the clear protective film from the soleplate. Too late she realised when it was ruined and impossible to clean. Shrugging her shoulders, her mother put on her coat to go out for yet another iron...
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My Sister's goldfish 'Spice' is a real geriatric. My niece bought her when she was 16 and she's now 35, so we reckon Spice is coming up for 20 years old in a few months time. When they're on holiday Spice goes to a friend's house, so maybe the frequent holidays have something to do with her longevity. Sadly Sugar, who was bought at the same time, survived for only a few weeks.
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An Irishman's Philosophy In life...
There are only two things to worry about—Either you are well or you are sick. If you are well, there is nothing to worry about, but if you are sick, there are only two things to worry about—Either you will get well or you will die. If you get well, there is nothing to worry about but if you die, there are only two things to worry about—Either you will go to heaven or hell. If you go to heaven, there is nothing to worry about and if you go to hell, you’ll be so busy shaking hands with all your friends you won’t have time to worry!

Cheers from the land of the Tartan and the Heather, Love Kate xxx.