Wise Words / Some Funny Stories and Sayings...

Hi Folks,

Try as she might, Wilma just couldn't shake hubby Donald out of his mood. At first he insisted he wasn't even in a mood, then he confessed he felt he'd been passed over for a promotion at work. He was disappointed and didn't see why he should try and be more cheerful.

So Wilma offered him a deal, Donald could mope about his lost promotion and she would mope because it was the anniversary of her Mum's death. Did he want to compare miseries - or get on and have a happier day ? No surprise that Donald, who'd forgotten what date it was, quickly chose the latter.

As Wilma said to me. "If you focus on your unhappiness you'll find there are always going to be people worse off than you. But if your main focus is on happiness, well - you'll be hard-pressed to find anyone in the world better off !"

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As it's Silly Saturday - I am adding a couple of funny stories and sayings...

An older couple is lying in bed one morning.They had just awakened from a good night's sleep.He takes her hand and she responds, 'Don't touch me.''Why not?' he asked.She answered, 'Because I'm dead'The husband asked'What are you talking about?We're both lying here in bed together and talking to one another!'She said, 'No, I'm definitely dead.'He insisted, 'You are not dead.What in the world makes you think you're dead?' 'Because I woke up this morning and nothing hurts.'

Husband and wife are shopping in Tesco's when the man picks up a crate of Stella and sticks them into the trolley 'What do you think you're doing?' asks the wife 'They're on offer, only £10 for 24 cans', he says 'Put them back. We can't afford it,' says the wife and they carry on shopping. A few aisles later the woman picks up a £20 jar of face cream and sticks it into the trolley. 'What do you think you're doing?' asks the man, 'It's my face cream. It makes me look beautiful,' she says. The man replies... 'SO DOES 24 CANS OF STELLA AND IT'S HALF THE FLIPPIN PRICE'

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Remember...Once you get over the hill, you'll begin to pick up speed.

I love cooking with wine.. Sometimes I even put some in the food. ..

If it weren't for STRESS, I'd have no energy at all.

Whatever hits the fan... Will Not Be Evenly Distributed.

Everyone has a photographic memory. Some, like me, just don't have any film.

I always know ..... God won't give me more than I can handle.

There are times I just wish He didn't trust me quite so much.

Dogs Have Owners ~ Cats Have Staff .

If the shoe fits ... buy a pair in every colour.

Cheers from the land of the Tartan and the Heather - Love Kate xxx.